Forgiveness

Forgiveness is the first step toward living a FAT LUCK life. It begins by releasing resentment and recognizing that holding on to anger harms the one who carries it more than the one it is directed toward. For me to do this I needed to list all the people I resented. In every resentment I examined, I eventually came to see that I had played some part—even if it was small. The truth was candid and uncomfortable—just by being there I played a part.

I also had to understand something: I don’t forgive others for their benefit. I forgive others—and myself—for my benefit. Forgiveness does not mean approving of harmful behavior. It does not mean forgetting what happened or pretending the pain was not real. Forgiveness is how I release resentments, grudges, and self-blame so I can reclaim my emotional freedom and make room for healing.

Forgiveness is a conscious, deliberate decision to let go of anger, bitterness, and the desire for revenge—whether the other person deserves it, understands it, or ever apologizes. Forgiveness does not mean I have to rebuild a relationship. In many cases, it allows me to set healthier boundaries. What matters is that I’m no longer living as a victim, ill at ease, and weighed down by resentment.

I now know that resentment is one of the most destructive forces in a person’s life. When we forgive, we are not excusing others—we are freeing ourselves.

A Simple Reflection

Ask yourself:

Who am I still holding a resentment toward that is preventing me from experiencing the peace I desire?

Ask a Question About Forgiveness:

If you are practicing the virtues in Living a FAT LUCK Life and have a question about forgiveness, you are welcome to ask it here. You may leave just your first name and last intial. We respect everyone’s anonimity. All information and comments are kept private.

If you would prefer to ask a question privately, you are welcome to email me directly at gerry@livingfatluck.com.